I wouldn't have said that 3 months ago, but I now know it's okay to fail. I recognize that I cannot be perfect in an imperfect world!!! There are other people out there just like me and you!!! We move forward two steps and then back one and guess what??? It's okay!!! It's more than okay really. What's important is that we cut ourselves a break, realize we are human and put what happened into perspective.
In case you hadn't already figured it out...
Yeah...I had a set back today and I'm not really sure why. I woke up in a mood and it's been brewing all day. So when I didn't get to go to the Y after work for Body Flow (yes I get cranky when I miss a class that I know gives me what I need to get me through the day) it didn't surprise me that I hit the "wall"! I am human after all!!! I struggle day to day like others that I know and don't know. I'm working towards a better me, but I know I would be lying if I said I'm always up and nothing negative effects me. Life happens and self-compassion is the island...the tropical oasis in the middle of the vast ocean. I want to be on that island all the time. Those that know me know I try to live by the "no worries" saying of a good friend of mine back in NH. That on top of being a Cancer, which automatically pulls we toward water, tell me I belong on that island, but reality says otherwise. Again that's okay as long as we show ourselves some self-compassion. It's okay to be unsure of what to do next given how far I've come, what I miss and the ones that I've lost. Life happens and we are all in that vast ocean we call life. It's what we do with that experience that makes life worth it. WE MUST be happy before we can make others happy. That doesn't mean we are happy go lucky all the time, but it does mean we can put it in perspective, realize we aren't alone and cut ourselves a break so we can be on that island oasis. Sometimes life offers second chances, but rarely are we given a third or fourth try, so make the best of each and everyday and know you're not alone!!!
I leave you with two sayings...
Because I'm worth it!!!
(It can be replaced with just about anything...happiness, love, acceptance, freedom, etc. What do you deserve because you're worth it???)
I accept and love myself as I am!!!
Monday, November 3, 2014
Sunday, November 2, 2014
You're going to wake up and be...
A very wise woman once told me, "you're going to wake up and be 30 and then you're going to wake up and be 35". Well I didn't wake up until I was almost 36! I have no regrets in my life, or at least I try not to, but waking up and realizing I have let these years slip through my fingers has left a lasting impression on me...along with a few other life changing events. Don't be me...don't let some of the best years of your life slip away. Know that there are a lot of people out there like you and me, so you're not alone!!!
Step 1 - Give yourself a break!!! No one is perfect!!! And believe me when I say this is difficult to admit (being a perfectionist) and even harder to do day in day out. However, give yourself a little compassion when something doesn't go the way you want it go. Instead of saying "you're such a loser for not finishing the list of errands", say "I realize the list of errands was long and it's okay that I didn't get everything finished this weekend. I can pick it up next week/weekend." What would you say to a dear friend? I'm pretty sure you wouldn't be critical and you would show that friend compassion. Why not do the same for yourself???
Step 2 - Realize that you're NOT alone!!! Everyone suffers at different points in their own life and the same struggles they have may very well be the same ones we experience.
Step 3 - Be mindful of your suffering! Meaning that if you are suffering, acknowledge it and then see/complete steps 1 and 2. Don't ignore and don't exaggerate what you are experiencing. Also, don't lash out at the ones you love!!! This will get you know where and eventually you and your love ones will be frustrated.
These three steps all need to be combined in order to be compassionate towards yourself (self-compassion). I'm not going to say it's easy and I'm certainly not going to say that I'm able to do this every day. We all have bad days and guess what??? It's okay to have a bad day! I promise!!!
I accept and love myself as I am!!!
Step 1 - Give yourself a break!!! No one is perfect!!! And believe me when I say this is difficult to admit (being a perfectionist) and even harder to do day in day out. However, give yourself a little compassion when something doesn't go the way you want it go. Instead of saying "you're such a loser for not finishing the list of errands", say "I realize the list of errands was long and it's okay that I didn't get everything finished this weekend. I can pick it up next week/weekend." What would you say to a dear friend? I'm pretty sure you wouldn't be critical and you would show that friend compassion. Why not do the same for yourself???
Step 2 - Realize that you're NOT alone!!! Everyone suffers at different points in their own life and the same struggles they have may very well be the same ones we experience.
Step 3 - Be mindful of your suffering! Meaning that if you are suffering, acknowledge it and then see/complete steps 1 and 2. Don't ignore and don't exaggerate what you are experiencing. Also, don't lash out at the ones you love!!! This will get you know where and eventually you and your love ones will be frustrated.
These three steps all need to be combined in order to be compassionate towards yourself (self-compassion). I'm not going to say it's easy and I'm certainly not going to say that I'm able to do this every day. We all have bad days and guess what??? It's okay to have a bad day! I promise!!!
I accept and love myself as I am!!!
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